“There is one who scatters, and yet increases all the more, And there is one who withholds what is justly due, and yet it results only in want. The generous man will be prosperous, And he who waters will himself be watered.” Proverbs 11:24-25
I read the above passage multiple times– during my time of reading a chapter of Proverbs a day– and it has really stayed with me. It has been applied to my heart in a way that would never have occurred to me in the past. I always saw this passage as speaking about giving money, whether to my Church or to others in need– I believe that is correct. But I recently started thinking that it might also be speaking about me giving of myself.
There is a bond, a warmth and friendship that we expect to find when we join a church, if that hand of fellowship is not immediately extended to us we tend to draw back and call the church unloving.
Give freely
Having started to see this passage in a different light, I’ve started to think that rather than sitting back and waiting to be loved on, I the Christian, need to reach out and love on other Christians. It doesn’t even have to be anything grand, acknowledging people with a warm greeting is a good start. If I can think less of myself and what I need from the community and be ready to give what I’m hoping to get, in the end more people will feel the love of Christ.
“Our instinctive thought is, “who do I know? Who am I comfortable with?” There’s nothing wrong with those questions, but the Jesus questions that create communities are, “Who can I love? Who is left out?” Instinctively, we hunt for a church or community that makes us feel good. It is good to be in a place where you are welcome but making that quest central is idolatry. And like all idolatry, it ultimately disappoints. But if we pursue…love, then wherever we go, we create community.”*
Do not be afraid
If you are human, you have been burned by someone you trusted- even if it’s just your parents telling you to go put on your shoes to go out but then they leave without you- so we are afraid that if we get close to people they will take us for granted, gossip about us or disrespect us in some way. If you are wise about when and to whom you get close, you will not experience the thing you fear. “Prudence protects us from fear, from shutting down”*
“Biblical prudence protects us from the twin dangers of naivete and fear in our relationships. Naivete is fed by how our culture values openness and vulnerability. You spill your guts to a close friend and the next thing you know; everyone knows what you said. So, you pull back, hurt and cynical about the possibility of friendship. Yes, your friend shouldn’t have told the world, but it would have been better to be prudent, more cautious in what you shared. Prudence, understood this way, keeps us from needless pain.”*
Take that step
“The biggest problem people have in searching for the perfect community is just that. You don’t find community; you create it through love. Look how this transforms the way you enter a room of strangers.”*
The day may never come where you find that church where the people’s “…love is without dissimulation” (Romans 12:9a) So be the one that waters, you may not be the only parched one in the community.
* All quotes are from ‘A Loving Life’ by Paul E. Miller.
